I get mad at myself sometimes because I have no idea what I want. One day I'm happy with everything. One day I'll hate everything. Sometimes I'm just not happy with my relationship or where I live or what I do. Sometimes I want what I had. Sometimes I won't something completly differant. I just can't be happy all the time with whats here.
The biggest thing is where I am. I want to move. South west perferably. I hate beeing cold and since I live in the northeast we get cold winters that last forever. I even get antzy this time of year because even though it's beautiful out, I know the cold is coming.
I don't want to go into my relationship but I'm attracted to stabability. Right now we don't have that. I like if you can sopport yourself, have a good job, be independent and be comfortable. I don't want anyone to take care of me, but I definatly don't want to take care of anyone! I can't stand when you can't do things for your self and are constantly asking others to do it for you when you are perfectly able to.
I'm content with my job though. I like the people and the hours. I just wish it was full time. Money is an issue but that will fix itself in time. I sometimes have to barrow some money off my parents from time to time but hey, I'm paying for everything myself. Including school in cash so I'm not doing too bad.
Something I do like is the fact I can leave. Not that I would right now, but if I wanted to go I could. Even if it's something as petty as going to the beach by myself for the day or something as big as uprooting and going to California, I could. Hell, If I wanted to live in Mexico for a year and work as a massage therapist on a resort beach somewhere, I could.
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